Consumer Affairs

So let me see if I have this straight. You're giving me a film with Alexis Texas on the cover. Rebeca Linares, Melissa Lauren (who seems to have had some face work done), and especially Holly West star in it. And they all swallow. I get to review this? Oh hell, and then there's the insanely gorgeous Sophie Dee, too? Wait. Did I die? Is this heaven?

Consumer Affairs is awfully close.

Alexis Texas is in the first scene, and while her tease is great, her face sitting is even better. Damn I wish that was me. To have that ass on my face is about the best thing I can imagine. Even more so knowing that, with Alexis Texas is Buttwoman, she's doing anal these days. I really did die, didn't I? Alexis gets mouth fucked while in a kind of catcher's squat, showing that ass off and gagging on cock. My favourite bit is where she's laying on her stomach on the couch and the guy just comes up and buries his face in her ass. I want that to be me. I will have my paychecks garnished for the rest of my life to do that. If you aren't familiar with Alexis Texas, first, where have you been, but second, you have to understand how indescribably awesome of an ass she has. They go through a few very nice positions, and then of course Alexis takes a big load in the mouth and swallows it down. This is worth the price of this disc.

And then there's Holly West! Have I mentioned how much I love it when the porn stars wear their wedding rings while doing this? That somehow makes it much hotter to me. Also extremely hot is the way Holly takes it in the ass, does an ATM, then takes a huge load in her mouth. With all of the talent on this disc, this scene will probably get lost a little bit. It shouldn't. It's that good. She makes the comment that she's never had cum in her mouth before, and that she doesn't know what to expect. The shame is that they didn't play off of that line at all going forward, just fading out after her swallow. Such an opportunity for interplay there.

Melissa Lauren's scene somehow comes off a bit flat. It's not for lack of effort or raw sensuality on Melissa's part. And it's Ben English on the other side, so you know he knows what he's doing. But somehow, even with the ass fucking, it seemed to be just going through the motions. Probably the only disappointment on this disc.

Sophie Dee is one of my absolute favorite porn stars these days. Somehow she seems to be faking it a bit on this disc. There's something in her interaction with her two male costars that seems a bit odd. But it's still a very hot scene. My favourite bit, as usual, is the reverse cowgirl anal, all the while she gives head. I wish Ben English would keep his hands to himself a bit more in this scene (he's getting back into that grabby habit), slapping Sophie's tits a bit more than necessary. Sophie taking two loads with those amazing eyes looking up at us is quite nice as well. Her voice at the end is oddly lovely as well.

Rebeca Linares is up next, and you talk about a woman who just oozes raw sexuality. She's amazing. And there's just something about the way she tucks her legs around her partner and moves her body that is just mind blowing to me. She makes you wonder, too, how a body that tiny can take a large cock in either hole so easily. You're a wonder, Rebeca, and this is one hell of a scene. The bit of makeup run during the facial and swallow is excellent.

Consumer Affairs is a great film. A lot of the swallowing discs I've seen focus far too much on that, where cum consumption becomes a bit of a fetish, and they screw up the actual sex. Full points to Ray Bones and the gang at Diabolic for avoiding this and producing some top shelf porn.