Apple Bottomz 5

Any regular readers of my ramblings know I'm more of a Claire Dames and Claudia Downs fan than a guy who wants a lollipop girl. Give me an Eve Lawrence or Alexis Texas any day. So with that, you'd think I'd be all over Apple Bottomz 5 (really, did we need the "z"?). While the asses on display are nice, a few of these starlets seem like odd choices for this series. It's a good film, but maybe a bit of false advertising.

We start off with Sunny Lane, who most definitely does have a fun body and a nice bouncy ass. She teases for a bit, both for us and her male costar. It was a bit annoying to see old school bad porno kissing out of her. You know the kind, where they flick their tongues at each other. I've never understood it, and it always seems to detract from any kind of chemistry that might be there. Sunny strokes and sucks him off for a good long time, using a lot of hand and aggressively rolling the tip of his cock around in her mouth. And then the bad porno kissing comes back again. I don't get it. The camera angles are generally big butt friendly, and the positions, while standard, are all captured well. Facial pop shot.

Shyla Stylez is up second (I guess the "z" in her name is appropriate with the title). The ferociously curvy blonde still knows how to strut her stuff, and I don't care if her breasts have been augmented: they look amazing. Shyla's scene is remarkably similar to Sunny's down to lighting and camera angles. She works with Ben English here, and I was pleased to see he seems to be calming down a bit on camera. He's still relatively intense, but he's not as grabby and controlling as he was in years past. Shyla seems to have a bad taste in her mouth when she goes to swallow, to that kills the buzz just slightly, but all in all, it's good stuff.

Holly Fox and Kristina Rose were more what I had in mind when I said odd fits for this disc. They both do have booty, don't get me wrong, but there's something about them that just doesn't seem to fit here. At any rate, aside from the odd playing with butt cheeks - I've never understood the bouncing an ass using their underwear thing... it makes butts seem like a sport - it's a nicely done scene. Holly and Kristina do have a bit of chemistry together, which always makes such a scene work so much better.

I'm a huge fan of Sophie Dee, so it says something when I say the scene with Emma Cummings is the best on the disc. The only detraction from me for this scene is that she shows off her ass the entire time with a buttplug in it. Very distracting, that. The other distracting thing for me is that the disc started to cut out a bit at this point. Of course, that can happen with any disc, so that's no particular fault of this production, but why does it always seem to happen during my favorite scenes? From the bits I could make work, Emma certainly puts that ass to good use. You'll enjoy it, I'm sure.

I love Sophie Dee. She just has the most amazing eyes. Oh, and there's that booty, too. I think of some of the money male porn stars make and think to myself, you wouldn't have to pay me to fuck her on camera. Or off camera. At any time, basically. She looks that lovely, and she's on full display taking on two guys at once in this scene. She looks best during the anal missionary sequence here in my book, but that's also the point that shows off her entire body the best. That's why I'm really not sold on DPs, as they tend to obstruct our view a bit. I'm happy that I get the occasional ATM in this scene, though a bit more on the rimming would be nice. Hey, anal porn's my thing, and when presented an opportunity like Sophie, I'm going to aim for everything I want. The only other major bummer was that they came on her ass, not her face in the end. That's criminal with gorgeous eyes like that. Facial, please!

There isn't a great deal as far as extras go to talk about. It's the standard behind the scenes reel, trailers, photos, and cumshots. For the ass fan, it's a pretty dang good disc. It's not my top big butt series out there, but let's face it: there's really no way to do this completely wrong. A well-directed, well-produced flick like this from Zero Tolerance shows an understanding of how to deliver a good film. Apple Bottomz 5 certainly is that.