Not Three's Company XXX

Director Will Ryder has spoofed the Bradys, Bewitched, and the Partridge Family, and now it's time to tackle Jack Tripper, Chrissy Snow and Janet Wood in Not Three's Company XXX, a loyal if not always funny adult homage to the late 70s/early 80s sitcom.

What Ryder gets right is the look and feel of the TV show, from the sets that look like they were recreated using blueprints of the show to the appearance of the talent he has cast (particularly Penny Flame, who is a dead ringer for a 1970's Joyce DeWitt). And I suppose in some sense he gets the humor right, too...since I never found the series particularly laugh-out-loud funny.

As you may or may not have already guessed, the storyline here concerns the roommates' attempt to find money to pay the rent in time, and of course, a misunderstanding that leads to a lot of double entendre dialogue. Brynn Tyler, who plays the blond haired, slightly ditzy Chrissy, has decided that to help raise money she's going to take a job handing out flyers for a local gym. But Jack (Van Damage) and Janet (Penny Flame) overhear only part of her conversation and deduce that she's taken a job as a street prostitute.

Other popular characters from the series appear in their porn versions as well, including Jack's best friend Larry (Tommy Gunn), landlords The Ropers (Dino Bravo and a spot-on Nina Hartley), and even Mr. Furley (Scott Lyons). Ron Jeremy also has a cameo as the bartender at the Regal Beagle, but don't worry - it's a non-sex role!

The sex in Not Three's Company is superior to the storyline, which I suppose is good news for a lot of potential buyers. After an opening masturbation scene with Brynn Tyler and a flesh-colored vibrator, we get to see busty Sienna West (playing "Lana" from the series) make out with Tommy Gunn. But the first really "hot" scene in the movie comes when Jack volunteers to watch over Chrissy's little sister, played by blonde-haired Madison Scott. Jack doesn't have her inside the apartment for more than a minute before Madison is begging to be fucked, and Jack can't help but oblige. Just when you think the scene is about to wrap up, brunette Allyssa Hall arrives to turn the scene into a wild threesome.

I have to admit I was a little disappointed that Penny Flame only does girl/girl in this movie, although she does have a nice encounter with Roxy Jezel that includes Penny wearing and fucking Roxy with a strap-on. Not only doesn't Penny engage in any boy/girl sex, but Will Ryder has made the odd decision of not having any of the three roommates get it on with each other, which is what you'd think fans of the series would fantasize about the most.

The remaining sex scenes in the movie consist of a blowjob-only sequence between Mr. and Mrs. Roper; a doctor's office tryst between Chrissy and a "physician" played by Eric Swiss; and a movie-ending scene that finds Mr. Furley lucking out when a call girl (Jenny Hendrix) that Larry has ordered for Jack shows up and assumes that Mr. Furley is the one who has made the appointment.

Not Three's Company is presented in widescreen anamorphic, and looks good on DVD, if just a tad oversaturated (which may have been intentional, given the bright colors of the sets and clothing). The audio, on the other hand, is disappointing. Not only does the movie only get a 2.0 Dolby track, but it doesn't appear that the crew used boom mics for the actors - the farther away from the camera an actor is, the harder he or she is to understand. Overall, I suppose the audio is average for a porno, but not what one would expect for a high-end release like this one.

The behind the scenes featurettes in the bonus materials are broken up into four parts, and combined have a total running time of about 85 minutes. The audio suffers the same problems in the behind the scenes as it does in the movie, but what's worse is the fact that the video quality (again anamorphically enchanced) suffers from some serious grain and pixilation issues. I'm guessing this is a combination of both poorly shot footage and compression issues, since so much material has been jammed onto one DVD. The extras also include a 4 ½-minute deleted masturbation scene with Brynn; a 6 ½-minute slide show; and trailers for Not Bewitched, Not The Bradys, Not The Bradys: Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!, and Britney Rears 4.

I have to be honest, Not Three's Company is my least favorite spoof of the ones Will Ryder has directed so far, but it's also my least favorite show to be parodied, so that may have a lot to do with my reaction. While I can't give the movie an overwhelming recommendation, I think there's enough here to please fans of the original sitcom.