Top Guns

Chase
This movie starts with the obvious change to make it porn worthy: blonde babes are seated in the cockpit challenging the boys. Hot sex is always going to be a byproduct of stressful war games and long hours of practice. That tensions builds and builds, especially because these girls are ultra-hot and around so much testosterone. It was hard to believe there were no interruptions in the first sex scene. I find bar bathrooms are pretty busy places, but nobody needs the ladies room at this bar but the two lovers. The acting is decent in this movie and Tommy Gunn is perfect for this movie. The storyline of this movie was mostly girl vs. boy but that was necessary to make a porn version. It comes off as a real movie with some porn mixed in. The second half of the movie gets to the XXX action faster in the scenes. My favorite scene was Tommy Gunn and the five girls - what a lucky man! Give it a watch! You will be entertained and turned on for sure!

Dallas
The original Top holds up surprisingly well as a slice of 1980s blockbuster entertainment. It's silly and overblown, but Tom Cruise is charming, the music is catchy, and the visuals are slick. Top 's porn parody, released in 2011, also stands the test of time as a memorable adult blockbuster. Notably, the visual effects are nothing short of remarkable for a porn movie. (And no, I'm not referring to the cosmetic enhancements of the movie's stars, although those are impressive, too.) Kayden Kross's gum-chewing Iceman (dubbed Hollywood here) is a pleasing variation on Val Kilmer's original. The movie is also happy to lean into the homoerotic themes present in Top , right down to the famous volleyball scene. (It eventually turns into a boys-versus-girls match in this case, though.) If there's one complaint, it's that the movie's whiz-bang production value almost makes the sex scenes seem incidental at times.

Jackie Daytona
The first scene sees Jesse Jane getting nailed so hard her tits flop and flap and pancakes. It's not surprising, there's only one way pilots know how to fuck and it's the same way they fly: with speed, accuracy, and power! Top Guns is both a tasteful dedication to the original and a delightful love letter to pilots across the USA. The pilots are all portrayed as ripped studs or sexy women, just like our military in real life. There is a recreation of the famous volleyball scene, a great decision considering volleyball is the world's sexiest sport. Sand? Bikinis? Abs? Crevices? Yeah. They have a sick orgy at the end where the squad decides they should all bang each other at the same time since they've been doing it individually anyway. It's a celebration of the true American way: gathering and fucking each other to completion to ease the unending stress of our jobs and lives.

Madison
Top has always been one of my favorite movies so I couldn't wait to watch the porn parody, Top Guns. This movie is full of top stars from 2011, Kayden Kross, Jesse Jane, Riley Steele, Stoya, and more! In the opening of the movie, I can hear "Danger Zone" playing in my head even though the music of the porn parody isn't quite as good. Jesse Jane and Riley Steele look extra sexy in their pilot helmets and uniforms. In scene one, Erik Everhard serenades Jesse at a bar briefly singing "Lost That Loving Feeling" to which she replies "cute attempt" and then they end up getting it on in the bathroom. Scene five is my favorite! Jesse and Riley take on Kayden and Stoya to see who is the best female fighter pilot. This action-packed scene is full of hardcore flying action and even harder sex! I think the parody is great ? it's silly and fun and carries on the Top movie quite well!

Susan
I've never seen the original film Top so going into this I wasn't entirely sure what to expect and didn't have anything to base this parody on. The story follows a band of female pilots who have just been invited to compete in the top competition as the first-ever female team, and the stakes are high. This title has it all: drama, tension, and lots of thrilling action both in the air and on the ground. Watch as stars like Jesse Jane, Riley Steele, Stoya, Kayden Kross, and Selena Rose join together to take on the elite of pilots and have lots of steamy sex along the way!

When it comes to the cliche of porn parodies, adult send-ups, and dirty movie tributes, only a handful of releases make the viewing experience worthwhile. Digital Playground's TOP GUNS is one of those rare results where everything works; the sex, the plot, the special effects, and the satire itself are all top-notch and tip-top. It's one of the most accomplished blue movies I've ever seen and puts so many other parodies to shame. Jesse Jane and Riley Steele look almost as good in uniform as they do in their birthday suits, and their scenes shine whenever they are onscreen. (Special kudos must go to Jesse, who never fails in bringing a high level of enthusiasm and energy to previous porn epics like TEACHERS, NURSES and CHEERLEADERS). I especially enjoyed their "off-camera" dual action blowjob which is supplied in the bonus section, along with a bunch of "behind the scenes" extras.

Kayden Kross, Stoya, Raven Alexis and Selena Rose are likewise a welcome sight whenever they're onscreen, and they maintain a professional level of acting (for porn that is) which keeps the story moving on its own. My only regret is that even with this number of female talent aboard, quality lesbian time is given short shrift. Sure, most of the performers get together for a big group sex scene towards the end, but more private girl-girl time would have been nice.

It's not necessary to be familiar with the original film to enjoy this title, but the the obvious tributes and riffs won't be as appreciated. For the past several years, I've praised some notable movies of this xxx-rated sub-genre, which includes releases like THIS AIN'T STAR TREK and BATMAN XXX: A PORN PARODY, and WKRP: A XXX PARODY. Well, TOP GUNS simply raises the bar on how an adult production can take on a mainstream film and make it worth everyone's while. If you want the best of the best, look up to TOP GUNS.

Before I even start to review this movie regarding its plot, sex, or acting let me make one thing clear; this movie is proof that there is NO EXCUSE for any Hollywood-produced film to have shitty special effects EVER AGAIN with the inflated budgets those director's work with. Yes this is big budget porn, but even then it pales in comparison to movies like Season of the Witch and other recent box-office duds who spent millions and still achieved borderline junior-college-level special effects. By watching Top Guns you will see what I mean, especially if you stick around long enough ( well, still have enough energy left over after all the hot sex inside....) to see the Special FX Behind the Scenes footage. The work done on this film shows that it takes only a little ingenuity, time, and care to create mind-blowing visuals, and that is something this film is absolutely filled with. To be frank, some of the effects in this film are so well done and so well crafted that I had no idea none of the fighter jets parked out in the hangar's courtyard were fake or that they weren't walking around outside an airport. It is that well done. On special effects alone, this film is perfect. Absolutely perfect.

This film, Top Guns, is most obviously a parody of the biggest selling Air related film of all time, Top . And while this one doesn't feature the acting chops of Tom Cruise or Val Kilmer the actors chosen for these roles really shine beyond belief. In particular Tommy Gunn, who seems like he is in EVERYTHING lately, stands out as someone who could actually make it in Hollywood WITHOUT having to fuck everyone. The man is a genius, and while his demeanor at times can be both mysterious and aloof, it only adds to the role he is trying to portray. Watching this film you feel convinced that if Tommy himself wasn't in the military, he at least grew up with someone who was as he looks and feels so much like a soldier it is uncanny. The girls, the real sellers of the film, are flawless with Jesse Jane looking cute as a button as always while still laying down some heavily dramatic acting and the taut Stoya showing the world she also is more than a pale skinned pussy and a beautifully tight ass. The film is HEAVY on dialogue, so those who came into this looking for a straight sex film may leave perplexed, but those of us who wanted to see a sexy cinematic experiment that is also heavy on the action will feel like they definitely got their money's worth.

But then after all, this is a porn film and not just a Hollywood action-blockbuster. Make no mistake, by focusing so much energy on the special effects and CGI graphics they did not skimp on the primal in-your-face raw fucking presented in this film. Every girl in here is beautiful smooth-skinned perfection with some of the greatest pussies currently being fucked in the business today. Selena Rose looks incredible with her perky tits and smooth, silky lower lips. Stoya is slim and stunning. Riley Steele has both the 'cute factor' as well as the dirty girl mentality going on and Kayden Kross is absolutely to die for. You will not even be able to catch your breath once you witness the amazing intensity that is the multiple girls on one guy orgy that has to be seen to be believed. This film is NAUGHTY and it goes places you wouldn't even imagine when it comes to the fuck factor.

In short, Top Guns is a landmark achievement in porn cinema and goes above and beyond the title of a 'parody film' that may be laid upon it. More correctly this is a work of art in its own right and not a simple sexual joke. Top Guns is an instant, modern classic and it deserves your undistracted viewing tonight.

A silly parody with all the sex you'd want. The actresses are on the extra skinny side and the men are moderately attractive so do with that what you want. You'll get some laughs so if you're watching with a partner, you might enjoy.

Dr. Chauntelle does not use a rating system. Five stars is a default setting only.

Digital Playground's Top Guns (2011) is amaaazing!!

...amazingly silly and campy, that is. Consider this:

"Fly hard with deep throttle action as Jesse Jane and Riley Steele show the men the true definition of hardcore power. They are the new top guns, the two best female fighter pilots the Air has to offer going up against their arch rivals, Kayden Kross and Stoya, the unbeatable bitches from the Navy. It's lust-fueled girls going up against the hardest fly boys in the military to prove they've got more thrust in their game and more devious tactics than any enemy riding their tail."

My. Goodness.

But in spite of the ridiculous box copy, Top Guns is actually quite fun. It's also rather significant in many socio-cultural ways. Here are some things:

1. Top Guns brought home AVN's Best Selling/Renting Award in 2012, which means lots of people saw (and perhaps were influenced by) this film.

2. Top Guns is a parody of the 1986 classic, Top - duh!!

3. In a very un-Digital Playground-like move, Top Guns' characters are not named their porn names. The characters all have call signs!! And, where applicable, their call signs mimic their Top--character-being-parodied's name. Because I absolutely must, they are:
(Performer - Top Guns Name for "Top Name")

Jesse Jane - Bandit for "Maverick"

Riley Steele - (Baby) Boo for "Goose"

Kayden Kross - Hollywood for "Iceman"

Stoya - Mystery for "Slider"

Raven Alexis - Vegas for "Charlie"

Tommy Gunn - Gunman (GunnMan?!) for "Jester"

We also have Styles and Papa (another flight team of boys), and Selena Rose as a mechanic named Spice - heeee!!

4a. Top Guns shares many things with Top : pilots in fighter pilot school, competition, a hott civilian instructor, and danger when practice and pilot in-fighting quickly turn into a real "live" situation. Our "Iceman" Hollywood strongly disapproves of this "Maverick"'s (Bandit's) sloppy and dangerous ways, and there's also a (god awful) volleyball scene. And the story development and pacing in Top Guns are just as unbelievable as they were in Top - perfect!!

4b. There are also many differences between Top Guns and Top : the inter-military competition between Air and Navy quickly becomes boys against girls, our baby "Goose" Boo does not die, and very strong girl power/women's equality and teamwork/collaboration themes run throughout this entire film - nice improvements!!

Although I liked Digital Playground's efforts in Fighters (2011) much more, Top Guns was a great film - a sexy, campy take on some recognizable source material with a little bit of humor and progress thrown in for good measure.