Sweet Treats

Owen Brown and Larry Pazz star as "David" and "Vinny," respectively (I guess), "amateur" pornographers in Plum Production's SWEET TREATS. (However, given that this film is supposed to come across as real-life gonzo porn, it was never clear to me why these guys had to make up fake names for themselves). Nevertheless, David and Vinny are on a mission from David's uncle Howard (whom we never see) to produce their own porno as a test of their ability to become adult filmmakers (wasn't that how Steven Spielberg got started?).

Owen, who looks like a more physically fit version of Gary "Bababooey" Dell'Abate from the Howard Stern show, lets us know right up front that he wants to get into porn to get lots of pussy. (Wow, what a revelation. And here I always thought guys just wanted to get into porn for the artistic and literary integrity inherent in the genre). Owen has the bright idea of finding girls off the street to appear in their film. Unfortunately, while the guys hunt the streets of Los Angeles for chicks, we have to hear lots of mind-numbing banter between Owen and Larry including such conversational gems as "dude, this sucks," "dude, there's nowhere to park," "dude, we gotta find some girls," and, lest we forget, "dude, this weather sucks."
Luckily, however, the budding pornographers don't have too much trouble finding nubile, sexually willing young women wandering aimlessly around Los Angeles with apparently nothing better to do than wait for two schmucks with a video camera to lure them into a bedroom.

First on the roster is Candi, a busty blonde with some unfortunate piercings through her face and tongue. After the guys approach her on a deserted stretch of beach all by herself (convenient, huh?), they give her a quick line of bull about how they are making a documentary about real people living real lives of reality (or something) and it is off to the bedroom where it doesn't take too much convincing to get Candi to strip down and get to business. Unfortunately, after Candi peels off her bikini, I immediately wished she hadn't. While she generally has a nice figure, Candi has one of the worst, most asymmetrical, unnatural looking boob jobs I have ever seen. It looks like she got her breast implants done at Home Depot. I was also made a bit queasy by her labia which were the size of mudflaps. Anyway, Owen fingers her meaty hole and gets some BJ action before emptying his load in her mouth. John Strong (?) then enters the scene to give Candi an extensive pounding in a number of positions before also leaving a creamy deposit in her mouth. Candi is definitely a sport, I'll give her that much.

After driving and walking around Beverly Hills, the guys encounter Jesse, a very cute, young, dirty blonde, with a pleasantly curvy natural figure. Jesse reminds me of a girl you might find in Hustler's BARELY LEGAL series and is definitely the most "real" (i.e. non-porno) looking girl of the bunch. The smooth talking duo again go through the motions of allegedly scamming Jesse with talk of modeling and documentaries before moving the action to yet another bedroom. Jesse quickly blows and manipulates Owen to completion before getting it on with Larry. Larry also gets some BJ action and fouls Jesse in the missionary and reverse cowgirl position before squirting on her chest.

Later, the guys come across another trim cutie, Hispanic-looking Sabrina Jayde. Sabrina has a great, trim, natural figure and cute face but strange, long, thin eyebrows courtesy of Lily Munster and many unfortunate tattoos and piercings on an otherwise terrific body. (A few more tattoos and you could play "Where's Waldo?" on Sabrina's torso). Sabrina gets it on with Owen in, what is arguably, the most engaging scene of the film. Owen fucks Sabrina like a sailor who just got shore leave after six months at sea. He pounds her petite body mercilessly and even appears to release inside her at one point (I couldn't really tell). It was also fun to watch Owen relax Sabrina with slow, rhythmic thrusts and then give her a deep, hard insertion when least expected. Owen continues with Sabrina in various positions before also leaving her with a jizz moustache that makes her look like a pornified "Got Milk?" advertisement.

Finally, the randy duo come across Nadia Foster, another petite, blonde, while filming the Hollywood sign, and, in short order it is again off to the bedroom where Nadia blows Owen and the two screw in the cowgirl, reverse cowgirl and doggy positions until Nadia is left with a DNA goatee.

All in all, SWEET TREATS, is good for what it is. The girls are young and fairly attractive, the action is decent and the lighting, videography, direction and sound quality were all more than acceptable. However, given that the girls here are all clearly paid actresses, I wished that the guys had dispensed with their bullshit gonzo premise and inane chatter about trying to find random women on the street to fuck . (Trust me, if it were that easy to bang hot girls off the street with nothing more than a video camera and a dopey story about being a documentary filmmaker, I would be at Circuit City right now buying my own video equipment.)

Although it would definitely be fun to see a film wherein real girls off the street are convinced on the spot to engage in random acts of carnality (no doubt such films exist), SWEET TREATS is a decent, interim guilty pleasure. Extras include a photo gallery and six previews of other Plum Production films.