Squirt Machines

I can watch an attractive woman do just about anything, and after watching Jules Jordan's 2-disc Squirt Machines, I've added another fetish to the list. This movie is filthy (I'd expect nothing less from Jules) and it should be watched by squirt fans and normal folk alike.

One thing you'll get in a Jules Jordan flick is plenty of tease and this movie is no different. We start off with Savanna Stern checking herself out in a mirror. After stripping down, she crawls upstairs and plants her head on Mr. Pete's waiting cock. He fucks her giant tits and bangs her doggie style on the stairs. On the couch downstairs, Savanna lays back and Mr. Pete tries and fails to get her juices flowing with his fingers. After pounding into her in the missionary position, he walks her over to the glass coffee table and tries to massage a squirt out of her again. She never really starts flowing and all we get are a couple sprinkles on the table. Mr. Pete jerks off on her face, and Savanna helpfully cleans up whatever drips on the table.

Next, we creep up behind Sindee Jennings standing outside overlooking a valley. She wiggles her ass and plays with her asshole before wandering inside. Laying on a couch, she warms up both of her holes. James Deen enters, fucks her throat, smacks her tits, and bangs her in the missionary position before she unleashes a stream like a garden hose back into her own mouth, which she gargles and swallows. After a little more deep dicking she squirts all over the camera, the floor, James's face and dick, and pretty much anything within 10 feet. He eventually works his way into her ass, and Sindee helpfully narrates that she's never done anal before. After some more squirting and gaping, he drops a load in her mouth.

The next scene has a voyeur feel to it as we watch gorgeous little Jenna Presley in white thigh highs showing off her ass. She plays with a giant glass dildo before walking to the front door to let Lee Stone in. He lifts her up on his shoulders and starts licking her pussy. Now the camera moves inside, and Lee fingers Jenna until she sprays. He takes her from behind and she squirts on the camera and keeps on dripping like a leaky faucet. (I think you could make this girl squirt just by tapping her on the shoulder.) At one point she squirts in his mouth and he spits it into her mouth. After cycling through a few positions, Jenna drops to her knees and neatly swallows Lee's load.

Outside by the pool, Jada Fire is getting ready for the most insane scene in the movie. She jiggles her ass and reveals a sparkling red jewel covering her asshole. Across the way, Flower Tucci bounces her ample ass and spreads her checks to show us a blue jewel in her ass. Chelsea Rae then walks up and all three start caressing. Chelsea's sporting a diamond butt plug. They go inside and meet up with Erik Everhard, Mark Ashley, and Mr. Pete. This scene sees Flower and Jada unleash torrents on everybody involved. All three ladies take it in all three holes, including double penetrations for each. Chelsea tries to get a squirt going but all she really manages is a little wetness. That's okay, though, because the other two more than make up for it. This scene is two, maybe three scenes worth of material and it's a must see.

Over on Disc 2, Bobbi Star is spreading her ass for us out on a balcony. The sun is low in the sky, making the lighting throughout the scene difficult. For this reason, some of the detail is lost to shadow. When Bobbi wanders inside, Mark Ashley bends her over the table and goes straight to her ass doggie style. Then he sits her on a tall chair and fucks her pussy missionary until she sprays all over him. He switches to anal in the missionary and then doggie style positions, with plenty of gaping. She doesn't spray much more and after a few more positions, he cums on her tongue over a glass table, which Bobbi laps at like a puppy.

Next up is the weakest scene in the movie. Amber Peach leads Emma Heart into the house by a leash. Both are wearing corsets and both are on the heavier side. Even a little spanking with a riding crop isn't getting me into this scene. Both girls take anal, but only Emma really gets going in the squirt department. After sharing a facial, they share a cum-filled kiss, and wave good-bye to a forgettable scene.

Back outside, Sophie Dee is in a tight camouflage outfit and carrying a . She's hunting somebody (it almost sounds like she says conservatives, maybe it's Serbians or Syrians - but who really cares). She finds Ian Scott jerking off and makes him take his clothes off at gunpoint. Then she sprays all over his face before kneeling down to blow him. She gives a mean BJ that involves ball sucking and scrotum biting ... but in a good way. They walk into the house and eventually Sophie works her way into an anal reverse cowgirl. She takes anal in the missionary position and squirts all over the camera and his dick. To close out the movie, Sophie squeezes every last bit of cum out of Ian's cock.

The extras are on Disc 2, and you have a cumshot recap, photo gallery, cast list, website info, a trailer, and an extensive behind the scenes segment giving us a peek at all of the girls except for Savanna.

Aside from a few spots where the sun didn't cooperate, this movie, shot in HD, captured all of the squirting and fucking action beautifully. Anybody looking for a top-notch hardcore porno, regardless of squirting preference, will want to pick this one up.