Debbie Does New Orleans

Vivid really needs to do something about the video quality of Paul Thomas's films. In a word, it sucks. The image is all soft and grainy. This is true for all of of the Thomas films on DVD I've seen. And I hate the clumsy navigation system they use. They really ought to check out VCA, who is much better.

The best thing about this film is the music, occasionally sounding like Ry Cooder. This is not one of Paul Thomas's better efforts in terms of plot coherence. In fact, it's pretty damn hard to figure out what's going on. Well, after somewhat lame travelogue footage of New Orleans as the credits roll, the film gets right into the action as we go to a bar where the show is two women in cheerleader outfits giving head to two guys in baseball uniforms. I guess this is jock porn! They then have intercourse, with the typical "oh yeahs" coming from the women as the audience forms a white noise background. An acoustic guitar plays blues throughout.

Then we got to a football locker room with several cheerleaders pouring champagne for two ballplayers (get it?). One of the girls hits on Sky, but she pretends not to have heard and blows her off. She's bummed because her boyfriend (Bobby Vitale) and fiance won't take her to the Superbowl because he wants to put his time in on their hotel. As a consolation prize he gives her a pink teddy bear. Is this a dumb plot, or what? Before they can have sex, another babe shows up to check in. As he gets head from her, Sky drops by, sees them, and takes off her ring and leaves. Then we move back to the strip bar where some cheerleaders are giving each other head. In a back room, a guy plots to buy Sky from some other guy. The lesbo chick comes to Sky's room and gives her a strap-on dildo. She seems to go off with the other girls, but comes back to find Sky in the bath, and we are off to a lesbo scene. After some finger fucking and pussy licking, the girl puts on the strap-on and gets to work. Sky then puts it on returns the favor.

Sky is the best thing this DVD has going for it. She is a very cute blonde, and has a great rack.

Then two players and cheerleaders roam the streets of New Orleans and run into two transsexual prostitutes. The couples go to a room and have sex, and the prostitutes follow to get to a look. Got to hand it to Thomas. He does manage to work in some kinky stuff. Next, we're in a hotel room with Sky and a guy named Langly, who rags on her ex-beau, and another girl.

As he becomes the love interest, we see what I take is supposed to a comic touch, a fat guy in different costumes tails them and is not noticed. After some more travelogue filler and another transsexual who asks for Debbie's autograph, we eventually get to the next scene. Back at the strip club, the three watch as a girl uses a dildo on her pussy. Sky then goes down on Langly as another girl watches.

But before this goes further, the film cuts to another location as the three have sex. Before it's over, we cut to yet another location, the hotel, where three continue having sex. Debbie's boyfriend then shows up with flowers asking for a second chance. They agree to meet the next morning.

She shows up, but Bobby Vitale is waylaid on his way. Next we see Langly has Sky tied up and her boyfriend being set up to be gang by ballplayers unless she agrees to join in. Plus, she'll miss the Superbowl if she does.

So Debbie does some cheers for the audience and then has sex with a guy. Hardly a hot scene given the set up. Seems like a quasi- scene. Afterwards, she returns to her boyfriend at his hotel only to find him banging yet another babe. So she looks at her engagement ring and then up. And then--well, that's it! What a weird ending.

Somewhere, there was a great idea for a film. Something emotional does get through, and the sex scenes are generally decent, the girls pretty happy. Even the acting isn't half bad. Unfortunately, however, Thomas seems like he never got beyond phoning-in the idea.

The sex wasn't really hot in this - in fact, it wasn't even warm. The biggest turn-off was that in all the sex scenes, all the porn starlets had at least half their clothes on. What kind of sex is that?!