No Exit

No Exit is the latest release from director James DiGiorgio and producer Rob Spallone, the creative behind VCA's Sopornos series. This one is a slight change of pace from that Mafioso inspired world, even though Rob makes an appearance in a role that has all the same ingredients of his Bobby Soporno character. The movie plays sort of like a mockumentary or comedy focusing on the production of a troubled porn movie; think of it as a mix between Chris Smith's American Movie and Mamet's State and Main, but set in porno land. The end result is nothing like either of those mainstream films, but a similar intent seems to lie just beneath the surface.

Things start off in DiGiorgio's production office as Tawny Roberts (playing herself) comes in for a casting call for his latest picture. We're never told what the title of the movie is, just that it's set on some island. Tawny lands the lead role without sucking the director's dick, but when his executive assistant (Marty Romano) comes by offering on-set perks, she gives in. They screw on DiGiorgio's desk while he's out of the room. Tawny has an awesome body and looks great sprawled across the desk, especially when Marty pulls out and sprays his load across her chest and abdomen. Unfortunately, hard-ass producer Rob Spallone walks in about this time and fires poor Marty; but Tawny stays in the picture!

Following a production meeting scene that lasts way too long, Sabrine Maui and Don Fernando stick behind and go at it on the conference room table. Sabrine lies back, spreading her legs open for Don's oral advances. After getting sucked, Don gives it to Sabrine in a couple of positions. One of these positions appears to be a doggy-anal, but the poor camera angle makes it difficult to really see what's going on. At the end, Sabrine opens her mouth during the facial as Don sprinkles his load from above. Once again, Rob Spallone walks in after the pop shot and fires Don, prompting Sabrine to quit.

The video finally transitions to the island porn set where ARIA is busy in a poolside pre-production photo shoot. The "island" looks more like an upscale backyard; is this part of the joke? Inside, Kyle Stone talks over his upcoming scene with DiGiorgio, revealing he has nothing better to wear than the polo shirt he showed up in. James shoots anyway, as Kyle and ARIA come down an elegant double staircase, meeting at the bottom. Kyle starts by eating her out on the steps, but it's ARIA who really steals the show by wildly inhaling Kyle's cock for an energetic blowjob. Staying on the steps, they move through cowgirl, doggy, and missionary positions before Kyle jerks off into ARIA's mouth.

By the fourth scene, DiGiorgio's formula is wearing thin as we're to sit through an arduous half-scene as he directs Dino Bravo in a setup with Ruby. Dino's character is supposed to be a lounge singer, and DiGiorgio is intent on coaxing a serenade from him as he fondles and kisses Ruby's breasts. Not only is this not funny, but it's repetitive and ultimately boring. After some lengthy foreplay and some brief penetration, DiGiorgio cuts the scene short when Dino can't get wood. There is no pay off in this scene in terms of comedy or eroticism, so why waste our time? But there is a distant lawnmower that kicks-in in the background during this scene, but I'm not sure if this was intended or not.

In one of the movie's more creative (and humorous) sequences, DiGiorgio catches a quick snooze, immediately transporting himself into "Jimmy Land." James finds himself in a stark white room sitting across from Jim Holiday and Ron Jeremy, with Nakita Kash and Tawny on the table in front of him. In this dream sequence, Jim imparts wisdom, telling James that it's all about "toes and assholes" these days. This is followed by one of the movie's better scenes as Nakita and Tawny go to work on each other. There's plenty of pussy eating here, and even some dildo play. Nakita closes out the scene by sucking on Tawny's foot while eyeing the camera with a wicked gaze. If not for this scene alone, the disc is still worth watching to hear Jim say, "Shut up, Ron" every time RJ tries to say something.

DiGiorgio wakes up with a fresh drive to finish his movie, but the production is still mired by various snafus. In another lengthy on-set production meeting, James gets so mad he tells Dino to spend the rest of the shoot in his room. Ruby soon follows to finish off her earlier scene. After sucking his cock, she takes it up the ass in a spoon position while using a vibrator on herself. Dino finally pulls off the pop shot, spraying his load onto Ruby's big tits.

Back downstairs, DiGiorgio is busy setting up his final scene with Tawny and Pat Myne. Pat holds a video camera in his hand, focusing on Tawny as she gives him a great blowjob; she even sucks his balls and lets him titty fuck her a bit. Pat returns the favor by eating her out. This is followed by some standard penetration in missionary and reverse cowgirl until Tawny opens up her backdoor for some doggy action. Pat caps off the scene by spraying most of his load into Tawny's open mouth; she sucks his cock some more but doesn't swallow. This is easily the best scene on the disc, but it's a little too late to save the whole movie.

Usually VCA DVDs are top notch all around, but this one has some troubling deficiencies, other than the feature itself. The video and audio are both above average with a crisp picture and equally high quality sound. But the disc really hits the wall in the extras department. Outside of a photo gallery and one trailer for The Sopornos 3, there's really nothing here to look at. With the exception of their earliest DVDs, I can't remember seeing a VCA DVD with so little to offer.

It's kind of hard to tell where James DiGiorgio was trying to go with No Exit. Is it supposed to be a mockumentary? If that's the case, it's not very successful. Much of the intended humor is strained, overplayed, or simply too "inside" to make it accessible for the average porn viewer. Most of all, the humor isn't well-enough defined; exactly what's supposed to be funny here? The sex is also pretty weak and definitely sub-par for what one might expect from VCA. I hope DiGiorgio and Rob Spallone return to the Sopornos material; they seem to handle that format much better.

Directed by James DiGiorgio, No Exit is supposed to be a loose interpretation of Jean
Paul Sartre's one-act play of the same name, but what this adult film has to do with Sartre's work is anyone's guess, so I'm guessing the title was chosen simply because they couldn't figure out what to call this below average adult film and thought the reference might make them an extra sale or two.

What No Exit really wants to be is an adult film about the making of an adult film, but we've seen this idea put to much better use by other directors in the industry. The movie opens with Tawny Roberts arriving at the offices of DiGiorgio to offer herself up as the new star in his upcoming movie. DiGiorgio agrees and he leaves the room so his assistant, Marty Romano can make out with Tawny on the office desk.

We then go into a pre-production meeting with DiGiorgio and his crew that takes up way too much of the movies running time. As a reviewer of adult movies, I always welcome the chance for the director to try and make a good story out of his film with a little exposition, but this scene seems like nothing more than DiGiorigo's crew having fun on camera...I'm sure they'll all love to have a copy of this film, but for the average viewer, this is dull, tedious stuff.

At the end of this staff meeting, two of the participants, Sabrine Maui and Don Fernando make out, but it's not a particularly appealing scene - even considering the fact that it contains both anal action and a facial at the conclusion.

Next, it's off to the movie shoot which is supposed to be taking place on a secluded island, but just looks like someone's house and backyard in southern California. There's a decent scene (which is supposed to be part of the film within the film that DiGiorgio is shooting) between Aria and Kyle Stone on a staircase, which is followed by a less-than-decent scene with Ruby and Dino Bravo outside that doesn't even have a cumshot in it.

There is one sequence, however, that saves No Exit from total failure, and one so entertaining that it might just be worth renting this title (or borrowing a copy from a friend) just to check it out. In it, DiGiorgio has fallen and has a dream where he meets Jim Holliday and Ron Jeremy (playing themselves). Jim takes time to explain the art of adult filmmaking to DiGiorgio and we then get to see a sexy girl-girl sequence between Tawny and Nakita Kash. It's a shame the rest of No Exit couldn't have the humor and erotic intensity of this one scene - it's worth checking out if you get the chance.

The movie returns to mediocrity after this, however, giving us one more scene with Ruby and Dino (this time, he manages to pop on her tits), and a closing segment between Tawny and Pat Myne which is a little better than average, thanks to the fact that it contains some anal action in the doggy position and a nice facial at the end.

As for bonus materials, this disc is one of those VCA releases that doesn't have much to offer. There's both a slide show and a photo gallery featuring Tawny, a chapter selection and a trailer for The Sopornos 3.

Had all of No Exit been as entertaining as the Jim Holliday/Ron Jeremy dream sequence, this would have been a highly entertaining movie. Sadly, however, everything that comes before and after is pretty much forgettable, including most of the sex.